The 2007 Christmas Letter

If you received a Christmas card with this blog site listed, welcome to the 2007 Estep Family Christmas Letter. If you’re a regular reader (Jeff), welcome as well…and Happy Holidays!

Like any year, it’s been a year of milestones and firsts. Luckily, there was a minimum of obstacles encountered this year, so I’d have to say it was a pretty good year.

Once again, we endured a winter in North Carolina virtually free of snow. I’m not sure whether the kids (Kaitie and Nathan if you’ve forgotten…) remember what snow is and I know for certain that they’ve never built a snowman. Keep your fingers crossed for some of the white stuff this coming year!

Despite the lack of snow, we still had quite a cold winter, so we headed down to Florida in March for a two-week vacation along with Kim’s parent’s (Wayne and Eileen). Week one was the most family-oriented as we spent our time in Orlando. We visited the Magic Kingdom for only one day, but what a great day it was for the kids. Never did mouse ears look so appropriate on two smiling faces. We also visited SeaWorld on a very blustery Florida Day. Otherwise, the weather cooperated beautifully.

The second week was spent at Daytona Beach at the Ocean Walk Resort. It was an incredible unit with a magnificent view, but our timing was off as we hit a very loud Spring Break week. Still, we had a ton of fun among the tattooed and pierced partying college kids, at least until the next-to-last day when Nathan put the “break” in Spring Break and busted his collar bone on the water slide. I think his “adventure” in the emergency room was his most exciting event of the entire trip.

Once we arrived back to NC, Nathan again garnered the attention of some medical folk when he had one of his molars extracted. It was the first out-patient surgery for either kid and I’m happy to say that the parents survived...barely. Nathan came out like a champ.

Both kids reached exciting milestones in the beginning of the summer. First of all, they both donned their blue mortar boards and graduated from Carolina Kids Academy. Not long after, they both reached their 5th birthday (I have NO idea how they became big kids so quickly). And then in mid-July, both kids started kindergarten at Olive Chapel Elementary, complete with back packs large enough (on them anyway) to serve as a sleeping bag. (For those wondering, the school system here has year-round classes). An extra-added bonus was having a visit from the kids’ Pap-pa and his new wife, Kitty. And for the record, I’m thrilled that Kitty is part of the family.

After six weeks of school, Kaitie and Nathan reached their first “track-out” time. In year-round talk, tracking-out means that they take a 3-week vacation between roughly nine weeks of classes. We took advantage of this time and traveled to Massenutten, VA where we met up with Dad and Kitty again as well as traveled alongside Wayne and Eileen .

School started back up in September, but Kim and I took a nice mini-vacation for our 11th Anniversary…an over-night getaway (our first alone since the kids were born) including a half-day spa treatment and a wonderful dinner (with no kid’s menu).

The celebration was a last-hurrah of sorts as I was ordered by my doctor to go on a fairly strict low-carb diet in order to get my cholesterol in check. I’m happy to report that my blood levels are in great shape and that the entire family is following a much healthier lifestyle. Not a bad way to wrap up the year.

We hope all of you had a healthy and wonderful 2007 and wish you the best throughout all the holidays and into 2008.

The Results Are In

If you recall, back in September, I was presented some alarming numbers regarding my blood health. Basically, my doctor accused me of "streamlining carbs" or "going on a drinking binge" because my cholesterol and triglycerides were so out of whack. After the appointment, I set some goals to improve my health, specifically the blood health, by my December 5 lab appointment. Well, the results are in.

To remind you, my measurements in September were as such:

• Weight = 164 pounds (although I was 166 when I started my diet)
• Triglycerides (TGs) = 667 (Less than 150 is preferred)
• Total Cholesterol = 260 (Less than 200 preferred)
• HDL (good cholesterol) = 41 (Greater than 40 preferred)
• LDL (bad cholesterol) = Unmeasurable due to high TGs (Less than 130 preferred)

My goals for my December appointment were:

• Weight = Less than 150 pounds
• Triglycerides below 300
• Total cholesterol less than 175
• HDL around 45
• LDL, no goals set, but was hoping for below 130.

My results ARE:

• Weight = 151 (close enough…lol)
• Triglycerides = 107
• Total cholesterol = 138
• HDL = 60
• LDL = 57

For the first time since I've had my blood checked (20 years or so), my good cholesterol actually exceeds my bad cholesterol. And my TGs have NEVER been as low as 107. Needless to say, I'm pretty happy!

And so is my doctor. He sat flabbergasted as he read my results, telling me he'd never seen such a turn-around. Then he floored me when made one statement. "How did you do it?"
I told him about my diet, and he literally wrote down the foods I ate and even the recipe for the ricotta cheese dessert! Naturally, the medication of Zocor and Niaspan was a major factor in my results, but the good doctor was quick to point out that there is no way I could have had these results without my changes in diet.

So, at this point, I'd have to say my diet has been a success. My goal was met, but that doesn't mean celebrate with a 4-pound bag of M&Ms and a tray of cupcakes. No, my celebration will be to continue to live as I have for the last 3 months. I'll still crave those snacks; much like an alcoholic craves a drink. But when I fall off the wagon, I plan to be smart about it (like the single servings enjoyed over Thanksgiving). Christmas sweets and snacks will be enjoyed to a minimum and healthier snacks will take their place. I've learned that it's possible to live within this lifestyle, not just exist.

As for new goals, my next appointment is in 6 months (June 4, 2008 for blood work). My goal is to be a couple of pounds lighter (under 150) and to maintain the same blood levels. Right now, I'm still wearing the same slacks. They might be a bit looser now, but not as much as one might think. I hope to be down to that 33-inch waist in 6 months and hope to be in a better exercise routine.

Thanks to everyone who has offered encouragement, recipes and stories of your own over the last 3 months. My fight for better blood is not over, but will continue the rest of my life. I look forward to having you join me.

The Spirit of Christmas is On the Air

We’ve all gone to the mall or discount store before Halloween and noticed the shelves already stocked with Christmas items. Each year, it seems to happen earlier to the point that it’s almost a cliché joke to hear Holiday music while one is still wearing shorts and sun block. Well now, you can hear that same Christmas music in the comfort of your own home, without tossing on your old Bing Crosby LPs or your Mannheim Steamroller CD.

Last season in Raleigh, there was one particular radio station that played all Christmas music. They used to be Sunny 93.9…the station that overplayed Elton John and Celine Dion. On November 1 of 2006, they became all holiday music, all the time. Well, at least until after Christmas, when they became Kiss 93.9. The format changed from easy listening to “feel good” music…ranging from 80’s dance to today’s more upbeat music. Frankly, I enjoy listening to 93.9 now and then when other songs hit “overplay” status on my preferred stations. I assumed they would convert to Christmas on November 1 again this year, but hearing “You Dropped a Bomb on Me” by the Gap Band convinced me that they canned the holiday genre.

Eventually, I began to wonder if any station would be playing holiday tunes this year. Admittedly, it was pretty early in the season, but with all the store decorations flooding my senses, it made me wonder if in fact we’d have an official Christmas station this year. As I scanned the radio dial, I found that 102.9 indeed was “Carolina’s Official Christmas Station”…even endorsed by Santa himself. Christmas had been saved! There was now a guaranteed 24-hour sound track to accompany all yuletide activities. Still, it’s pretty early in the year for Nat King Cole and Jose Feliciano. After all, this was around November 10…nearly two weeks before Thanksgiving!

In the morning, I generally listen to 101.5. They have played the same adult contemporary style music for as long as I can remember. The music is okay, but I typically listened to their “morning show” deejays. In fact, they’ve even talked about a couple of my blogs on the air, so I have a special place within me to listen to these guys. Well, on November 14, I tuned in as I normally do, and lo and behold, Elvis’ “Blue Christmas” blared from my speakers. Surely this was only a once-per-hour type of airing. But subsequent songs proved that assumption wrong. Mix 101.5 was now broadcasting exclusively from the North Pole.

Over this past weekend, I was painting my bedroom (another blog-worthy venture in itself) and turned on my son’s boom box for accompaniment. After a while, I realized I just wasn’t in the Christmas music mood, so I turned from 101.5 back to 93.9. What I heard was good Ol’ Bing singing “White Christmas!” Could this be the right station? Yes it was. 93.9 is now playing “Kiss-mas” music until the big day itself. So we now have not one, not two, but three “official” Holiday music stations in the area (and not one adult contemporary station).

I suppose I can understand the logic. After all, what other genre music exists where so many people know the words to so many songs? I dare you to listen to an hour of Christmas music without humming or singing along to at least one of the songs. And what other type of music invites the likes of Andy Williams, Josh Groban, Annie Lennox, Faith Hill, Mariah Carey, and even Twisted Sister equally onto the airwaves? When you think about it, as irritating as so much yuletide music can be, it’s the most popular music there is. So what radio station general manager wouldn’t want to pump up advertising revenue with a little Jingle Bells and Little Drummer Boy?

As I close my thoughts, Gene Autry is crooning “Here Comes Santa Claus.” My toe is tapping, I find myself humming, and I think of my kids’ impending giddiness at the thought of Saint Nick. You know, maybe Christmas music should be played more often after all.

South Beach Thoughts

It’s been over 6 weeks since I’ve entered the South Beach lifestyle. I’m about 12 pounds lighter now and thought I’d present a few highs and lows from my journey thus far:

Biggest Surprise: It’s not so hard. I’ve been amazed at how easy it’s been to fix dinners and even find some meals available at restaurants. Just make sure you like salads and chicken.

Biggest Challenge: Exercising. I continue to have trouble finding time to exercise the last few pounds away. My belt tightens and my slacks are bigger, but I feel like if I exercised a little more (a LOT more) I’d actually go down a couple inches in the waist.

Biggest Frustration: Not knowing the effect on my blood until December 5th. I know the weight loss is helping my overall health, but as I’ve said before, it’s about my blood health. They don’t make a triglyceride scale to stand on…yet.

Best Diet Meal: I’ve learned to cook sirloin steak consistently well, along with grilled peppers and other vegetables. However, as god as the George Forman grill is, it dries out steak WAY too much. One must cook it up on a skillet if not grilled outside.

Worst Diet Meal: It’s a tie between two meals I’ve prepared. The pan-fried salmon was quite good, but the smoke created nearly brought in the fire department. That’s one dish best cooked on the outdoor grill. The one I didn’t like was the baked cod. I think cod is meant to be fried or grilled, not baked. Rubber bands tasted better.

Best Diet Dessert: My creation of Cocoa Ricotta Crème. Take ½ cup of part-skim ricotta cheese, one packet of sweetener (Splenda), ¼ teaspoon of extract (I use both vanilla and peppermint extracts and my wife likes coconut), and ½ teaspoon of unsweetened cocoa. Mix together, top it with Cool Whip Free…sprinkle a pinch of cocoa for good looks…and enjoy! However, make sure you use Polly-O brand ricotta. Others have a cottage cheese texture which takes away from the experience.

Worst Diet Dessert: Ricotta Crème without the flavoring. I only endured that once. Thank god for cocoa.

Best Cheat: I am an M&M freak. I love my M&M’s. Of course, any type of candy is basically banned within this diet, so this was a worry for me. I’ve found, however, that I can satisfy my cravings by simply having 2 to 4 individual M&M’s. Not four handfuls like I used to eat, but just four M&M’s. This handles my chocolate fix without gulping down a ton of carbs.

Biggest Grocery Frustration: In the interest of time, I usually cook (or rather, heat up) a Jimmy Dean omelet for breakfast rather than cook my own eggs. The two most available types are the Three Cheese and the Ham and Cheese. They also make a Western Omelet that quite delicious, but only Kroger carries it. For the last 3 weeks, they’ve been out of the Western Omelet. Dang it…why doesn’t anyone carry the best one?

Best Grocery Surprise: South Beach is EVERYWHERE. I have to question the 11 grams of carbs South Beach approved cookies, but they claim to be acceptable under Phase 2. Hopefully, the people at South Beach, Inc. haven’t merely sold out to Kraft to market their product and that these foods really are good for you. The fact is, no processed or frozen packaged food is as good as home cooking. But living in this hectic drive-thru microwave world, it’s a decent compromise to find an "acceptable" meal now and then.

Best Side Effect: There have been two side effects from this new lifestyle in addition to weight-loss and (hopefully) healthier blood: an appreciation of "better" food and a more healthy…um…morning bathroom session. Okay, so maybe this is TMI, but frankly, when I was on a higher carb and higher fat diet, my time on the "throne" was not the healthiest experience. Since increasing the fiber and cutting the fat, let’s just say that I leave with a healthier feeling.

Worst Side Effect: not so much from the diet, but from the medication. Luckily, I’m not experiencing the predicted hot flashes when I take my full-dosage of Niaspan. However, a more subtle side effect is itching. There are some mornings where I swear there’s a ton of ants crawling on me or biting me. It’s quite irritating, but luckily not an every day occurrence.

So, the journey continues. I’m hoping to be a few pounds lighter by my doc appointment on December 5, and also hope that my belt will tighten by one more hole. So far, it’s been an easier change than expected, although I do still miss the occasional donut and bag of M&M’s. Still…it’ll all be worth it.

Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!

I suppose when most people approach an upcoming birthday, they remember celebrations from their past. When I have such thoughts around my birthday, I tend to recall goulish masks and scary costumes. (Thank goodness my birthday is on Halloween or else I’d need major therapy). Personally, I recall sheets worn over my head in a blinding fashion, my Man from U.N.C.L.E. mask that nearly suffocated me, and a devil costume that my mom hand-sewed for me, complete with pointy tail. As I aged into my teens, the disguises faded to the yearly dressing as a "hobo" merely to pass the costume cops so that I could beg for candy. Upon entering college, youth was reborn (with the help of a keg of Iron City Light) as I recall dressing as Zorro and a couple of other less flamboyant characters. But no costume rests deep within my memory as well as the one I wore in my late 20’s. In the early 1990’s, I not only dressed the part, I became Beetlejuice.

My incarnation as Beetlejuice occurred completely by accident. As Halloween approached in 1992, my girlfriend at the time insisted we visit Chapel Hill, North Carolina. Most areas across this country have at least one town within driving distance that is famous for their intense Halloween celebration. Chapel Hill is such a town. Every October 31, costume-clad college kids gather by the thousands to Franklin Street to display their creativity, ingenuity and depravity. (82,000 people attended the celebration this year). Three types of people gathered on "The Hill"…the observers who merely watched in amazement, the slightly-costumed who walked the streets (usually with beer in hand), and those that appeared to have been dressed by Hollywood’s best special effects artists. For this particular Halloween of 1992, I was content to be an observer, but my girlfriend insisted on dressing to some extent. I had no objections since I’ve always enjoyed the spirit of the holiday.

I found an old pair of surgical scrubs and frizzed out my hair (which was a LOT longer back then) so that I’d look like a mad doctor. I added black circles around my eyes for that crazed effect. I have to admit, for a 30-minute plan, my costume looked pretty decent. We ventured to Chapel Hill, parking about ½ mile away, and was immediately lost in the crowd. I was amazed, as this was my first visit to the celebration. Frat brothers dressed as a group of Vikings riding a boat…9-foot tall monsters…and plenty of other expertly dressed partygoers. And as I said before, there were thousands of costumed individuals roaming the street. However, no mater where I walked, I kept hearing someone yell, "Beetlejuice!" Being a fan of the movie, I kept looking around for someone donning the black and white striped suit and a hideous mask, but I never saw such a person. "Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!" It finally dawned on us that they were yelling at me! While my focus was on the mad-scientist look, I never realized that I had such a resemblance to Beetlejuice, but in fact, the hair and the black eyes created a remarkable likeness. From that point on, I claimed to be dressed as Beetlejuice, but in surgical scrubs.

The next year, I found a white sports coat and white pants at the Goodwill store and applied black duct tape all over. I also let my hair grow out from the beginning of August until Halloween and bought an assortment of "Beetlejuice-like" props such as large bugs to chew on and plenty of green, black, red and white make-up. I also rented the movie and watched it several times so that I could learn the nuances and voice. By All Hallow’s Eve, I had transformed into Beetlejuice.

I must have pulled it off, because I won several costume contests over the next few years. One award was given at a friend’s party where everyone pitched in 5 bucks. I think I won about $150. I also entered a contest at an Applebee’s where I won second prize, which was a neon bar sign that I sold in a garage sale the next year. The winner was a very bosomy Elvira. Most of the judges were male. The biggest prize and thrill of the season was when I attended a contest at local bar. Hundreds of folks gathered and I ended up winning "Best Impersonation." First prize was a trip for two to the Bahamas. You would be amazed at how many attractive women hit on a Beetlejuice-looking guy when he has such a prize in his possession. However, I never cashed in on that prize. It turned out there were too many fees involved to make it anywhere near "free."

The greatest reward I received as Beetlejuice was on trick-or-treat nights. The neighborhood kids delighted at seeing Beetlejuice greet them at the door, although admittedly, the younger ones were a little intimidated. I probably caused many children to have a fear of clowns after the parents assured the tikes that I was "just a clown." But the funny thing is that kids would come by in the summer time and ask if Beetlejuice was going to be back the next year. Even the ones that were scared asked that. Despite the silliness of it all, the kids liked it. And that is a better reward than any neon sign or faux trip to the Bahamas.

The Beetlejuice costume has been long tossed aside…partly because my hair (what’s left of it) just couldn’t take the punishment, and mostly because I’ve moved on to other things in my life. I have a new "girlfriend" (I now call her "wife") and I have two little trick-or-treaters of my own. Perhaps one day I’ll resurrect Beetlejuice, but right now, he’s best tucked away as a pleasant birthday memory. From here on out, my future memories will include Spiderman and a Ladybug, and whatever else my little ones dress up as in the future. And those memories will be better than ever.

A Year Blogged By

It’s been a year or so since I began writing a blog. I started doing so because a few people suggested that I should stretch my writing muscles. I like sharing my thoughts without conveying too much of my personal life and my hope has been to make you smile, cause a reaction and inspire you to think a little. I seem to have done a little of each judging by my readers’ reactions. I’d like to review my first year a bit here and perhaps solicit even more reaction.

I’ve blogged about a wide range of topics. One of the more controversial stances I took was regarding Breast Cancer Awareness (“Not just Breast Cancer Awareness...but ALL Cancer Awareness”). My intent was not so much that the pink-ribbon campaign was over-blown, but rather other types of cancer were being ignored. I most certainly support any effort to alleviate breast cancer and have no problem “buying pink.” However, I’d like to see a more aggressive “blue ribbon” campaign towards prostate cancer. As I type that, I imagine Pabst would be the primary sponsor of such a campaign, but there seriously is a blue ribbon effort to increase prostate cancer awareness. Sadly, since this is probably the first you’ve heard of it, I suppose their efforts are not too successful. Regardless, please understand that I’m not “Anti Pink Ribbon,” but pro any ribbon towards cancer awareness.

I forwarded “The Christmas Ball,” about the golf ball that my brother and I exchange each year, to several local media, including radio and newspaper. I was pretty thrilled to see a brief mention of my story on a newspaper website, and even more excited to hear the local “morning crew” talk about this holiday tradition at length on the radio. I gladly wrote down the suggestions that they and their listeners suggested for future exchanges. Although I have to admit, I’m not sure how to place a beat-up and burnt golf ball into a puppy. Yes, that was a real suggestion.

Another piece I sent into the local media was “Kaitlyn and Katlin.” about the poor 4 year-old girl that was found decapitated by her own father. I was so furious with that murder that I forwarded my blog to many people. While I never saw or heard mention of it in such print or on the air, I did receive a few comments from a radio DJ and one local reporter. I just wish that reporter would have shared my comments in the paper.

It seems, much like “Kaitlyn and Katlin,” most of my “venting” pieces get the most fired-up responses. My take on Kwanzaa (“Spell Checking Kwanzaa”) resulted in “Hell yeah!” agreement as well as cries of racism. If anything, it was “holiday-ism.” “Advice to the Stupid” brought forth sheepish admissions from dear friends that they were the idiot drivers toward whom I was complaining. Like they say, love the sinner, hate the sin. Just don’t take offense when I give you a one-finger salute…I still love you. And I’ll still wish you all Happy Holidays come Christmas time, no matter how many people claim I’m either non-Christian, un-caring or are in agreement with my point.

Probably the one blog I’m asked about most (and the one I’m most proud of) is the one about my dad writing a book (“My Dad the Author”)…with most inquires about how his book is doing. I’m happy to report, “quite well!” Frankly, after selling his first couple dozen in the first weeks, I wasn’t sure just how successful he’d be beyond that. I liked the book and others around dad liked the book, but I figured the demand would be finite, and that he’d have trouble selling past the first couple hundred. I was wrong. So far he’s sold about 800 books! It seems his top niche is to attend Nitro High School class reunions and peddle his book there. At the Class of 1957 Reunion a few weeks ago, he sold a remarkable eighteen books. And in early September, the Charleston Gazette-Mail printed yet another story about Dad, complete with a very handsome photo. But his success hasn’t come merely in book sales. Shortly after I visited Dad last October, he sent a book to a lady he attended school with so many years ago, Emma “Kitty” Lyons. Kitty sent a note along with her order referring to Dad as a “kindred spirit.” He likes to joke that the term impressed him very much, especially after he looked it up I the dictionary. Seeing as how neither Dad nor Kitty owned a computer, an old-fashioned pen-pal relationship began, which evolved into the occasional phone call and then into a number of phone calls a day. Finally, in a move that surprised both my brother and I, Dad traveled to Fort Myers, Florida to visit Kitty for an extended stay. That visit turned into a wedding ceremony and a very happy and reborn Dad. And for the record, I approve of Kitty. She’s a great gal.

There have been plenty of unwritten blogs that I’ve composed in my head, but never had time to write. The aforementioned addition to our family was certainly blogging material (Tentatively titled, “E-Step-Mom”), and when you’re the father of 5 year-old twins, there’s an unlimited amount of observations, joy and heartache I could share. I had several pieces planned on our March vacation to Florida alone, from watching the kids’ first experience at Disney World and Sea World, to our first LONG road trip, to spending a family week at Daytona Beach during Spring Break Week. (No kids, Daddy was NOT looking at the tattoo on that young girl’s backside.) I was fortunate enough to have time to share some kid-related thoughts in “Pop and Circle Dance” and “Gosh darn, son-of-a-gun…this friggin’ crap has me all screwed up to heck.” It seems that kid stories always get the most laughs, and I hope to share more in the future.

Finally, you’ve probably noticed that my blogging has focused on my health lately. I hope not to bore you with statistics on triglycerides and cholesterol, or with whining about my lifestyle change along the South Beach and beyond. So far, the response from my readers has been very supportive and I thank each and every one of you.

Many have given me encouragement to continue writing beyond my expectations, and others have offered their own blogs as inspiration and mentoring for me to continue mine. I hope to keep you coming back to my pages and ask that you spread the word if you have a reaction to my thoughts. After all, it’s your reaction that keeps me writing in the first place.

Entering a New Phase

Phase One is complete, and let Phase Two begin! Whoo hoo!

Okay, so Phase One was not nearly as bad as I first thought. Sure, I’m sick of salads and meat, but by the end of the two weeks, I had my homemade dressing recipe down just right and have been almost looking forward to my morning V8 (almost). My nighttime ricotta cheese dessert has been refined to be such an enjoyable experience, I may continue to savor the cheesy treat beyond this first Phase.

So what were the results of Phase One? Sadly, not as good as advertised. The "Book of South Beach" claims that the average weight loss from Phase One is typically 13 pounds. Obviously, some people have to have a lesser weight loss to keep that average down, and I was one such person. After losing 7 pounds the first week, I actually gained 0.4 pounds the second week. I was a bit discouraged this morning after I weighed in, but that disappointment was soon replaced by quiet jubilation, as I had to pull my belt one hole tighter to hold my pants up.

I have to constantly remind myself that it’s about my blood and not my weight. Sure, I want to lose a total of 15 to 20 pounds, but it doesn’t have to be lost overnight. The truth is, although I followed the diet over the weekend, I ate a packaged "South Beach" dinner for lunch yesterday and a Wendy’s Chili and side salad for dinner last night. Again, both are within the diet parameters, but the salt content was probably high on both and that led to an equal increase in weight for both my wife and I. In fact, I was 1.8 pounds heavier today than yesterday, so it’s all basically relative to the previous meal. And that’s why I say I want to lose 15 to 20 pounds, and not 17.5 pounds. One needs to shoot for a goal range and not a specific weight. A person’s weight probably fluctuates 2 pounds either way, depending on the day and the last meal. But if you stay within a 5-pound range, then you’ve stayed the course. So you see, I’m not really all that disappointed because I’m keeping it all in perspective.

As for the South Beach dinners, I find it funny how some of their own food contradicts their diet parameters. For instance, they suggest that only high fiber cereal with 3 grams or less of carbs be consumed. The South Beach brand cereal has 4 grams. What is boils down to is, despite packaged foods and restaurant faire being within a diet’s guidelines, nothing beats home-cooked fresh food, especially for weight loss. With that in mind, I’m sure I’ll have good results in the next few days.

I keep saying, "it’s about the blood." In case you’re wondering, my next lab work is scheduled for mid-December. I’ll try not to be too preachy about it or too whiny about not knowing my blood counts until then. You’ll all be the first to know what they are.

More on my life tanning on the South Beach in a few days.

(Update…I wrote this piece on Monday, but due to my busy schedule on Monday and Tuesday, I wasn’t able to post this until Wednesday. Since writing this account, the salt effects have worn off and I’m now down an additional 2 pounds!)

Week 2 Report: Cravings and Dilemmas

No specific topic of discussion today, but I wanted to check in briefly and let you know how things are going.

I’ll report my weight loss progress on Monday, in that I’m trying to keep it to a weekly report. However, I do weigh myself every morning and, well, I’m on a plateau it seems. Perhaps things will change by next week. I’ll let you know.

One of my weaknesses has been when I’m really hungry (skipped a snack due to work issues) and really craving some carbs. My mouth literally drools when I see a cookie or a donut. I swear I feel like I’m coming off an addiction at times.

The biggest obstacle of the week was how I handled eating out. I mentioned before that my family and I went to Red Lobster last week with great success. Well, on Tuesday, we went to Perkin’s for my wife’s birthday dinner. Not the fanciest of places to celebrate, but we knew we could get an omelet. And what a large omelet is was! Also, earlier that day, I had two salesmen take me to lunch. I was good and ordered grilled chicken breast and salad, but what a large meal it was! (No…I will not say "What a large breast it was!" That’s tacky). So for both meals, I was "good." The next day, I had gained two pounds! That’s when it hit me that I have to be aware not only of WHAT I eat…but also HOW MUCH I eat. It seems simple after I say it, but it’s not.

One thing I keep struggling with is the weigh versus blood health issue. I shouldn’t be so bummed about not losing so much weight this week, but more aware of how what I’m eating affects my blood. Still, I get discouraged at minimal weight loss. I shouldn’t, and I need to get out of that mindset, but I still do.

I also find that I’m planning for "when I get off of Phase 1." Meaning, after this weekend, I can start re-introducing some carbs in the form of fruit and whole wheat breads. But I’m also starting to think that the occasional indulgence in the name of special occasions should be acceptable. For instance, my birthday is coming up in 3 weeks. If we follow the same routine as my wife’s birthday, I’ll have no cake. But would one small piece of cake harm me? Not really. But what WOULD be harmful would be to have cake around the house for the whole week afterwards, nibbling away piece by piece every day. My logic allows just a little taste, but my resolve starts to reason that "just a little taste every day" is acceptable. It’s not. That’s where my biggest struggle will continue beyond Phase 1.

Lastly, thank you for your input on my medicine versus diet dilemma. My plan was to always continue my diet and exercise, but I wasn’t sure about taking all the meds. I decided to take the pills for now. Partly because one of the sales guys I had lunch with on Tuesday had been tackling the same issues as I for over 11 years. He mentioned the drug interaction is very rare, and as long as the doctor is watching me closely, I’d be fine. I know we’re all different with different reactions, but his experience put me at ease. He also had undergone a quadruple bypass, so his lifestyle was rudely forced upon him. I have a choice, and choose not to have a bypass. As a result, I’m taking the niacin along with the Zocor for the blood, and continuing the lifestyle changes for my overall health (and for my family). But I’m also happy to say that, after 3 doses, I have yet to have a "hot flash." Let’s hope that continues.

Have a great weekend everyone. The weather is going to be beautiful here and I figure I’ll start my walking exercise in full force on Saturday morning. I’ll whine about that next week.

One week down, a lifetime to go!

Today marks one week since I started the South Beach Diet as part of my lifestyle change. Or maybe more of a shift. Anyhow, the results are in and I’ve lost 7 pounds! Seven pounds in as many days seems to be a consistent rate of weight-loss, but in reality, I lost the first 5 in two days, the next pound took four days and the final pound disappeared over night. I attribute the initial loss to water weight…or at least that’s what everyone says about every diet. The next four days were a bit frustrating in that a couple of days, the dang scale didn’t budge a bit. This morning was a pleasant surprise when I dropped a pound, and I’m sure that has a lot to do with me mowing the lawn in humid 90-degree heat yesterday. Nothing like a good aerobic workout to knock off a pound.

This leads to my next obstacle in my overall lifestyle change: increasing my exercise. Each day at lunch, I’ve been taking a 15 – 20 minute walk at a pace that shouldn’t allow me to stink the rest of the day, but enough to get my heart rate up. The only time I waiver from this routine is when my co-workers join me and the walk turns more into a stroll in the park with nary a heavy breath. Although these daily walks certainly help, I’m feeling I need more. The one thing that actually improves "good cholesterol" (HDL) is exercise. Meds help of course, but exercise would be the better approach. So here’s my dilemma…I work and live a very hectic schedule where I’m constantly cooking, bathing kids, and doing house chores the moment I get home from work up to when I fall asleep for the night. There’s no time for the exercise. My morning is equally hectic from wake up through commuting to work. If anyone has any ideas how to fit an exercise routine into this day, let me know. I used to walk the treadmill once I got home and combined that with some light weight-training. I could probably start that back up again with minor adjustments to my day, but I’m still open to other ideas.

One discovery over the weekend was finding the number of walking trails in my neighborhood. While I knew they existed, and occasionally walked one particular path, I found that there are quite a few additional trails that connect to an overall network of trails within the town. I’m pretty excited by this in that I could easily take the kids with me "exploring" new trails.

Another somewhat exciting discovery this weekend was my ability to eat out within the constraints of the diet. A couple of friends often remind me of how bad it was for my family and I to eat out so much. Tuesday’s were devoted to Chick-fil-A; Thursdays to Jersey Mike’s; Friday’s and Saturday’s to where ever struck our fancy; and Sunday’s were generally fast food or frozen pizza at home. Those days we ate "in" were often meals of pre-packaged foods, such as the pizza, Stouffer’s lasagna, etc. If nothing else, this new diet has eased me away from that eating-out lifestyle. I believe we cooked and prepared every meal last week except for the South beach frozen dinners we had for Friday night (I just didn’t feel like cooking). On Saturday evening, we had intended to fix dinner at home, but found ourselves out shopping and running errands like we do so often. We opted to go to Red Lobster where I had grilled tilapia, veggies, broccoli and salad with water. Perhaps the only negative aspect of this meal with the saltiness of the fish, but I really felt no guilt or feelings that I cheated on my diet. No, we’re not going back to eating out 4 to 6 times a week again. However, it’s nice to know I don’t have to forgo one of my few social activities of enjoying a decent restaurant now and then.

Now I have one more request of you. Today marks a very scary beginning for me. My previous prescription ran out and today I’m to start the new prescription. To fight the cholesterol, I’m to take Zocor once at night. I’ve taken this before and it actually helped to reduce the bad cholesterol a lot, but it didn’t do much for the TGs. The second and more worrisome medicine is Niaspan, or niacin. My previous prescription (Advicor) was kind of a Zocor-niacin mix in one pill, with niacin adding up to 1000 mgs. Now, I’m supposed to take 1500 mgs of niacin along with the Zocor for one month and then up it to 2000 the next month. My concern with this drug combination is that they could interact negatively together…a bad interaction. No matter which website I look view, the combo is bad news. Admittedly, the Advicor had the same concern and it had no affect on me, and my doctor assures me that I’ll be monitored closely for any adverse reactions. But the increased niacin has me a bit worried. The niacin is also what makes me feel like I’m burning up (hot flashes). I haven’t had a hot flash episode for over a week now (hmmm…since I started the diet) and I’m not looking forward to them starting back up again.

Anyhow, here’s where I need your opinion. When I go back to the doctor’s office in December, he’ll check my blood. If the results are great, how am I to know whether or not the results are from my lifestyle or from the new medical cocktail? Should I skip taking the niacin (against doctor’s orders) and take out the medicine variable to see if diet and exercise along will work? Or should I basically follow the doctor’s orders, take the medicine, and then discuss my lifestyle changes at that point? I welcome all opinions, and I know many of you out there will have pretty strong opinions about both sides. That’s why I like my readers so much.

Things are going well, but there’s still a lot more to do. One week does not a new lifestyle make, but it’s a start.

Day 4 - Milk versus Beer

It’s Day 4 of my diet. Oops, that should be Day 4 of my new lifestyle…I still have to get used to that. A diet might end once the goal-weight is achieved and more sensible eating will maintain the weight. In a lifestyle change, those dietary restrictions need to be followed for the rest of one’s life. That’s my case, although I’ll probably whine about it until the day I die. But if this works, I’ll be around a lot longer to do the whining.

I sit here taking a break at work, munching on a chunk of Laughing Cow Light Cheese…very yummy. I’ve always liked cheese anyhow, so this is a pretty typical snack for me. For lunch, I packed a salad with some smoked salmon to add protein; a homemade dressing of olive oil, red wine vinegar and various spices; and a container of sugar-free Jell-O. Instead of my normal staple of Diet Coke, I’ve packed some Lipton Diet Green Tea, which I’ve become quite used to drinking. My afternoon snack will be a repeat of yesterday’s snack: some raw vegetables dipped in humus. I’m really surprised how good some of this is. And for breakfast this morning, I had a western omelet with sausage, and a little bit of skim milk.

Milk? I know that I mentioned that milk is a no-no, but I stumbled onto something last night while surfing the net. In response to one of my blogs, someone questioned as to why milk is a "Food to Avoid" on Phase 1 of the South Beach Diet. I really didn’t have an answer because I assumed it was related to the fat in milk, but skim milk was also to be avoided, so this didn’t make sense. What I found in my search were two things. First, skim milk is not banned due to fat (since there is none) but due to the lactose, or milk sugar. Lactose is as potent a sugar as raw table sugar when it comes to its effect on insulin (and therefore triglycerides). To get around this, I should consider lactose-free milk or soymilk…a prospect at which I really didn’t look forward. However, the second item I found was a 2004 addendum to the South Beach criteria. Basically, it allows up to two servings of skim milk per day! My SB book was printed in 2003 and I wasn’t aware of this update until last night. Other updates include allowing tomatoes and onions to be consumed in an unlimited basis and the inclusion of carrots in the later phases of this diet. (Carrots are very high in sugar, but apparently the fiber involved helps to offset). Anyhow, I was very happy to find this latter bit of information while at the same time, the first bit of info reminds me that need to drink milk in moderation. Water is still the only real recommended liquid to consume.

While I was at it, I decided to surf for information about one other consumable liquid: beer. Probably the biggest no-no with regards to TG’s (the official medical abbreviation of Triglycerides) is consuming alcohol of any kind. When I checked on the benefits of red wine, all I found was that the negative influence of alcohol on TG’s far superceded the health benefits. Basically, the liver needs to process the alcohol upon consumption. But it’s also the liver’s job to process the sugars, carbohydrates, insulin and TG’s in the body. In addition, alcohol is pretty much converted directly into TGs. It’s a chemical, physiological thing that I can’t really explain, but trust me. Anyhow, all this I already knew, which is why I’ve been drinking O’Doul’s Amber Non-Alcohol beer for the last few months. True, even NA beers have some alcohol. The way NA beers are made is that they brew the beer normally, and then remove the alcohol at the very end. There will obviously be some residual alcohol left in the brew, so "Alcohol-Free" is a bit misleading. Still, I wondered if NA beer is acceptable.

Sadly no, but not because of the minimal amount of alcohol. All beer contains maltose, which is a sugar. Apparently this sugar is one of the more kick-ass sugars there are, and it’s directly responsible for the common beer-belly. The worst kind of fat to have on one’s body is in the middle: the beer belly. Unfortunately, maltose is not removed in the process of NA or light beers…it’s just something that’s in beer. And I can’t have it.

I know it seems like I’m whining, but I’m actually just expressing some of the obstacles that I need to overcome. You see, this is why it’s a lifestyle change and not merely a diet. I got lucky with the milk in that I can enjoy that the rest of my life, and I actually like skim milk. I didn’t get so lucky with the beer. I suppose I could search the net for non-alcohol wines, but since fruit juices are also a no-no (fructose is the fruit sugar), I seriously doubt fancy grape-juice would be allowed either.

The good news is I’m allowed a lot of good things. And I’m starting to get used to the taste of V8. I’m enjoying that I’m cooking and setting a better example for my kids. I’m challenged by and enjoying the allowed foods, and looking forward to re-introducing some old favorites in the next phase of the diet, like most fruits (apples, strawberries, blue berries, grapes, etc), whole wheat bread and pudding. It’s still gonna be hard, but it’s been easier than I thought, and that has to be a good first step to a new lifestyle.

Why are YOU dieting?

Well, today’s the day I started my new diet. I have to admit, I had one hell of a "bachelor party" this past weekend in anticipation of marrying up to the ol’ South beach Diet. Buffalo Chicken sandwich on Friday, a ton of Japanese steakhouse food on Saturday, a huge breakfast buffet on Sunday morning, and a big ol’ Chicken Parmesan that I couldn’t finish on Sunday evening. Not to mention the cake and cookies and ice cream and wine I shared throughout the two-day anniversary celebration. The events were fun, but the food was completely decadent. I should be thankful that I didn’t die of a heart attack! So I weighed in this morning at 166.2 pounds. That’s 2 pounds more than Saturday morning thanks to the weekend of binging. Still, today is the first day of the diet so 166.2 is the official starting weight.

Here’s where I hear a lot of people ask, "why are you dieting? You’re a small guy! You don’t need to diet!" Unfortunately, I hear that a lot. I suppose a lot of people would feel good about people telling them they look fine, but for me, it’s not about the weight. As you know, it’s about the blood and I won’t get into the details again. So when I answer, I usually have one of several answers in mind:

• "Well, you haven’t seen me naked." This usually gets the more entertaining reaction, but when I say that, I’m referring to the "beer belly" that I have (even though I no longer drink beer). The fact is, I’m a small guy. I’m short and I am "small-boned," so the belly-fat on me isn’t as apparent. Unless I tuck in my shirt (which I need to do at work), I can usually hide the belly pretty well. But once the shirt comes off in the bathroom, it’s quite apparent that my torso had seen better days. It’s this mid-section fat that is apparently most dangerous. That’s all I need…more health danger
• "Maybe I look this way because I’m eating this way." I thought it was always funny that people think others should eat fatty or "bad" food…that the only time one should eat "good" food is when they’re losing weight. I have a news flash for you; healthy eating keeps you from getting fat. Period.
• "I’m not trying to lose weight. I’m trying to improve my blood health." You know the reasons behind this answer, so I won’t bore you.
  

The problem with people telling me I look like I don’t need to diet is that sometimes, I start to believe it. When I look in the mirror, I suck in my gut and think, "maybe they’re right." But in reality, they’re wrong. I DO need to diet, or at least follow a better diet. And I imagine you do, too.

Now, let’s talk about Day One of the diet a little. The hardest part of the day thus far has been substituting V8 for my OJ. I’m sure I’ll get used to it, but it was not a pleasant experience. My snacks should be salty, not my breakfast drink. The next hardest has been not drinking milk. South Beach doesn’t allow milk during the first two weeks. Although I usually only drink it during breakfast, you can bet what my first consumption will be once the two weeks are up.

My "approved" snacks have kept me from getting hungry…cheese sticks and nuts. And my lunch of salad with chicken strips and strawberry Jello was actually quite good. I think the only reason I’m feeling any hunger right now is due to stretching my stomach to the size of a VW Beetle.

I’ll be measuring myself tonight and taking photos. I’ll share the measurements, but not the picture…at least not yet. My plan is to present the before photo when I’m ready to reveal my after photo. I’ve always been one for drama.

Stay tuned as I venture further into the dieting world.

Pre-Game Warm-Up

It’s been a week since my doc slapped me in the face with high triglyceride levels and told me to shape up. So what have I done about it? Planning mostly…which admittedly doesn’t take one pound or reduce one cell of gooey blood. So, let me share my plan.

I mentioned triglycerides a lot in the last blog. The types of food that increases trigs are carbohydrates and alcohol. I’ve already quit drinking alcohol (with the exception of the wine tasting vineyard tour on vacation a couple weeks ago), so now I have to cut back on the carbs. There are a couple of diets to consider…the more popular being the Atkin’s Diet and the South beach Diet.

I lost some significant weight and lowered my trigs using the Atkin’s diet a few years ago. The only problem was that I got real tired of eating nothing but meat and eggs. I felt greasy and my breath stunk. I never bought into the whole Atkin’s diet because of the lack of grains (bread) and fruit. These are basic foods that NEED to be consumed. At least that’s what my health teacher taught me many years ago. So while facing this current challenge, I decided not to give the late Dr. Atkin’s another chance.

Next week, I’ll be starting the South Beach Diet. My wife lost a lot of weight using this diet in the past, and since I’m the house cook, I lost some weight along with her. South Beach isn’t about eliminating all carbs (except for the first week) but about eating the right carbs…such as whole grains and fruit. This diet makes much more nutritional sense for me.

My biggest challenge when facing this diet will be the first two weeks when I have to follow an Atkin’s-like, low-carb plan. No late night fig newton snacks. No morning bread, waffles or orange juice. No M&M’s. Just basic meat, eggs and vegetables. I’ll survive, but I’ll be grumpy after the first couple days I’m sure.

Why am I waiting until next week to start…why not now? Basically, we have a lot of food in the house that’ll go to waste after we start this new diet. Yes, we…as my wife will be dieting alongside me. This week, I’ve been eating up the last of the waffles and cereal. I’ve been eating those fig newtons. And I’ve been eating the last of the frozen entrees in the freezer. However, I have started making some changes. I’m transitioning from OJ to V8 (not an easy transition I’ll admit). I’m choosing salads when eating out, which we do far too much of anyhow. And I’ve gone cold turkey on M&Ms.

One other reason we’re dieting "starting next week" is that my wife and are celebrating our 11th anniversary this weekend. We’re going to pamper ourselves for a local but overnight "getaway" to include a dinner at one of our favorite, pre-kid restaurants. This get-away also includes a full breakfast the next morning. While we COULD structure our meals to the newer diet, I think we want to savor this last taste as we celebrate. Call it a bachelor party for diet. The thing is…we’ll still be ordering sensibly, in that we’ve found that eating "bad" things makes us now feel…well…bad. We’re embracing the new diet and merely giving the old diet a little push out the door over the weekend.

So the slight changes in the diet this week is kind of a pre-game warm-up. The real battle starts on October 1. I’ll make sure to share every thought and activity in embracing this new lifestyle.

Thanks for all the encouragement and comments thus far.

Triglycer-Al

It's been quite a while since I've blogged; far too long in fact. I apologize and hope to be more diligent in my blogging. But if you know me…you know I get busy and easily distracted. Therefore, I won't promise to be back regularly, but will I promise to make the effort. How's that for a wimpy commitment?

Speaking of commitment, I have to get much better at it. I'm not talking about a fear of relationship commitment…I've already overcome that (refer to wife and two kids). What I'm referring to is the commitment to better health. I have a very high triglyceride count, along with high bad cholesterol (LDL) and low good cholesterol (HDL).

While many of you have probably heard of cholesterol, you may not be as familiar with triglycerides. Triglycerides (or trigs, as I'll call them) are cholesterol's secret and mysterious cousin. There's not a lot of actual medical evidence that states that high triglycerides alone are bad for you, but there's an awful lot of suggested and statistical evidence. For instance, a whole bunch of people who've had strokes also happened to have high trigs. High trig counts are also associated with low "good" cholesterol. HDL, or the good cholesterol helps to improve blood flow in arteries. The best way to improve HDL is to increase exercise. Therefore, it goes to reason that trigs could be reduced with exercise.

The challenge my doctors have been faced with over the years is how to keep my LDL and trigs down while my raising my HDL. Many years ago, I took a medicine that lowered my trigs vastly and well within the goal levels. However, both the good and bad cholesterol's were minimally affected. This seemed fine for a while until the medical world decided that even higher HDLs and lower LDLs were to be maintained. It was then, about 4 years ago, that the musical-medicine game began.

Previously I was prescribed Lopid…a drug for trigs only. Later, I was prescribed Lipitor, which worked well for the LDL, but my HDLs remained low and my trigs started to rise. I moved on to Zocor, which has similar results, and to Advicor, which contains Niacin. The Niacin is intended to lower the trigs while the rest of the med is to attack the cholesterols. One side effect of the Niacin is that I experience pretty intense flushing, which is very similar to having hot flashes. My doctor assured me that there was no harm to come from these hot spells, only extreme annoyance.

After trying this lasted med, my levels were measured as follows:

• Triglycerides 667, Ideal: Less than 150
• Total Cholesterol 260, Ideal: Less than 200
• HDL 41, Ideal: Greater than 40
• LDL Unmeasurable due to triglyceride count

As you can see, this latest medication isn't doing the trick alone. What's really needed is a lifestyle change…and this is what this series of blogs is all about. I hope to document my quest for better health. I plan to eat better and exercise more, which I suppose we should all do. But for me, eating some foods like cookies or M&M's is a near addiction, so it isn't gonna be easy. Plus, my current lifestyle and personal schedule doesn't allow time to cook complex recipes. I've learned that "convenience food" is nearly the same as "junk food," no matter if the packaging says "Light" or not. And it's not all about eating food; it's about living better. It's about getting out to stretch and build the muscles. And it's about making the gooey blood go away.

So what I plan to share here are the joys of success and frustrations of failure. Let's hope there's less of the latter. I'll gladly accept encouragement as well as tough love. I'll read all suggestions for recipes, work-out programs and whatever else you have to offer. Maybe this blog series will be entertaining and maybe it'll bore your socks off. Either way, it's therapeutic to me and my goals and I merely invite you to peek in.

As for those goals, here they are:

• Lose 15 to 20 pounds. My current weight is about 1Z4 and I hope to get between 1X4 and 1X9. (and no, I'm not telling my weight…lol)
• Lose at least one inch in the waist. My pants are 34-inch waist, and while that might seem slim, it's really not for my body shape. Plus, I'm wearing stretch waistband slacks…and the elastic is stretched to the limit. I'm probably more of a 35 or 36. I want to wear 33 without the stretching.
• Lower my Triglycerides to below 300 by my December 5 appointment and to below 200 overall.
• Lower my overall cholesterol to below 175.
• Raise my HDL to about 45.

To be honest, the easy part will be losing the weight and inches. It'll be more difficult to control the blood because a lot of my problem is hereditary, and not just related to food (remember those TV commercials with the people that look like food? That's my situation). But the hardest challenge will be to maintain those levels once I reach those goals.

So…get ready….get set….get better!

Did you remember Flag Day?

Happy Flag Day everyone! Um, you DID know that it was Flag Day, right?

I don’t mean to sound overly patriotic or to take any specific political stand. It’s just that, had I not heard it mentioned on the morning news, I would not have known that today is Flag Day either. After all, it’s not a holiday that involves a day off of work, nor is it really a holiday that inspires fond memories of Flag Days past. Do you remember what you were doing on Flag Day ten years ago? Five Years ago? Last year?

Actually, I do have one memory of a Flag Day spent in Baltimore on a business trip back in the late 1980’s. As I searched for a place to eat along the Inner Harbor, I noticed all the restaurants were jammed packed. When I asked a local what was going on, he said, "why, it’s Flag Day of course." It turns out that Baltimore has a big celebration every year with bands, parties and fireworks since this is the site where the Star Spangled Banner was written (Fort McHenry and all that).

Anyhow, my point is that Flag Day seems to be a largely ignored holiday. Thanks to the reminder on television, I hoisted my flag this morning as I headed off to work this morning. However, I didn’t notice one other flag during my 17-mile commute. This is in sharp contract to the days and weeks following 9/11. I remember counting well over 50 flags during my morning commute. It was a tough time for us all and I think many of us found solace in the newfound patriotism and proudly flew the flag. And although you’ll see quite a few flying on July 4, it’s a shame that we can’t remember to fly the flag on other days, such as Memorial Day, Veteran’s Day, Armed Forces Day, and of course, Flag Day. And again, I’m as guilty as anyone else. But I am proud to say I do own a flag, and I hope most folks out there own one as well...whether it be a small mail-box sized flag or a larger one to hang off a pole. I think it’s important to have one in every household.

So in celebration of this day, I thought I’d post few flag and Flag Day facts you might find interesting. There’s plenty of websites out there with additional information, just google it and you’ll find it.

• Despite an official resolution regarding the flag being issued in 1777, it wasn’t until 1912 that the order of the stars and proportions of the flag were officially prescribed by executive order.
• There has never been specific meaning assigned to the colors of the flag itself. However, the official Seal of the United States contains the same colors and are designated as such: "White signifies purity and innocence. Red signifies hardiness and valor. Blue signifies vigilance, perseverance and justice"
• A flag is flown upside down to serve as a distress signal.
• When flying a flag at half-mast, it should be raised to its peak, and then lowered to the halfway point. When taken down, it should again be raised to its summit before lowering.
• The flag should be flown at half-mast on Memorial Day from sunrise until noon. At noon, the flag should be raised and flown at full-mast until sundown.
• A flag historian is called a vexillologist
• The blue field with the stars is called the "union."
• Until 1818, an additional stripe as well as a star was added to the flag for each new state. After 1818, the flag has returned to and remained at 13 stripes.
• A five-pointed star was rarely used in any symbolism prior to its use in the American Flag. Most stars had previously been presented with six points.
• The are 19 different holidays that are designated as days in which the flag should be flown. I won’t list them all here, but the list includes Easter, Thanksgiving and Christmas.

Happy Flag Day!

Gosh darn, son-of-a-gun…this friggin’ crap has me all screwed up to heck

My son’s daycare teacher reported that she overheard the boy using the F-word in the playground the other day. Needless to say, I decided to have a little talk with him later that evening.

"Did you say a bad word in school today?"

"Maybe."

"Well, the teacher told me you did. She told me you said a word that begins with F."

He looked confused. "No, I used another word. I told a friend that he was an idiot, and you said that ‘idiot’ is not a nice word." Technically, the boy was correct. We’ve tried to teach our kids not to call others by bad names, even if the word isn’t technically bad.

I smiled as I watched his disappointment in saying the word "idiot." "Well then, make sure you try not to call anyone an idiot again."

"Okay, I promise not to call anyone a fucking idiot again."

Okay, so this is where I needed to be sent to the emergency room for biting my tongue so hard, stifling the laughter. As it seems, my son never knew that the F-word is bad because he merely had overheard someone else say it. Sure, he could have heard is from me, but later discussion revealed it was another classmate. To my son, the F-word simply was not bad because he didn’t know it to be bad. "Idiot," however was a bad word.

This got me to thinking about bad words in general. The fact that someone is called an idiot is not perceived as a taboo statement in society today. However, add a supposed obscene adjective, and the statement is offensive. Why is the adjective offensive versus the derogatory noun? And what about an adjective that means the exact same thing. Let’s say "freaking" instead of "fucking." Is calling someone a "freaking idiot" any less offensive than being called a "fucking idiot?" Apparently so, because you hear the word "freaking" all the time on television. (Or "friggin’," "fricking," "flipping," or some other derivative).

Why is it that any kid can talk about poop or feeling like crap, but is considered a delinquent if that kid mentions the word "shit?" Is "shit" so much different than "crap?" It means the same thing…so why is one acceptable over another?

I’m not proposing a change to our language, nor am I supportive of my kids, or any others, speaking with a foul mouth. I just think it’s funny that it’s not the meaning of such words that are offensive, but just the words themselves. Wouldn’t you think the intent of such words, no matter the level of obscenity, would be the true measure of offensiveness?

Thinking about it just makes me laugh my ass off. Oops, I can’t say "ass", can I? However I can write the acronym of LMAO. Oh heck, now I’m really friggin’ confused.

Pop and Circle Dance

Last night, I attended one of the first milestones in my childrens’ educational career: The Daycare Graduation Ceremony. It can be called nothing else but cute as 24 little kids marched in a single row dressed in their caps and gowns to the sound of Pomp and Circumstance (or as my kids say, Pop and Circle Dance). They sang a rendition of Zip-a-Dee-Do-Dah ("Pre-K was fun, lot’s of learning and play…Zip-a-Dee-Do-Dah, Zip-a-Dee-Ay"), followed by "I’m a Shining Star" to the tune of "Itsy Bittsy Spider." Again, cute…or perhaps even adorable.

I stood with my video camera in a row of similarly donned parents that resembled coverage at any Presidential Press Conference. Cameras clicking and video whirling as the kids all sat down in a row while the director addressed the crowd and praised the children. When the diplomas were to be handed out, each child was told to come up one at a time, take the diploma, hug their teachers, and go back to their seat. The first three children complied as instructed. The fourth child (ironically, the director’s child) ran up before his name was called. That set a precedent as all kids started to head towards the podium. They still stayed in line, but not in the same order. Watching the teachers and director quickly sort through all the diplomas and hand them out was probably only a hint of the day to day challenges they faced in their class. I had to admire their patience and decorum in controlling the potential chaos. In no time, all the kids were seated again with diplomas in hand, most of them flicking at the tassels that hung from their mortarboards. Finally, the children were asked to stand up one more time, turn to the parents and cited a quick poem to thank the parents and state that the daycare will live in their heart forever. Cute.

The ceremony was followed by a slide show in the air-conditioned classroom (thank goodness). Although the show lasted about ten minutes too long, it was fun to hear the kids call out the names of their friends whenever said friend’s face appeared on the screen. As with all of the evening, it was more fun to watch the kids than the presentations or speakers involved. After all, it was the kids’ moment.

Before the cake was served (which brought the largest cheer from the kids), the teacher’s shared philosophical statements shared by the kids over the past year. I’d like to share those of my kids with you now:

• Rather than say "It’s better to be late than never," my daughter stated, "It’s better to be late than early." Unfortunately, she lives that philosophy to the letter (as does her mother) every day. My son’s take was, "It’s better to be late than at nine o’clock." My son, the cryptic philosopher.
  
• We’ve heard that "too much of a good thing can be bad." My son stated that "too much of a good thing can be playing with toys." I guess you can never have too many toys, or time to play with them, as is evident by out over-flowing playroom, which used to be a dining room. My daughter went the most logical route with, "too much of a good thing can be the most."
  
• Especially when being around kids, one has to be reminded that "patience is a virtue." My daughter has decided that "patience is a wait." Somehow, that makes sense. The boy stated, "patience is nice." Of course, it would be nice if either child practiced patience.
  
• Finally, so close to Father’s Day, we’ve all heard the phrase, "Father Knows Best." My children had a different view of father…being me. My daughter was kind enough to announce that "father knows how to do a head stand." This is true, although doing so usually has my kids tackling me right away. And my son summed me up by saying, ‘father knows tricks." I’ll hold back comment on that.
  
• One more statement I’d like to share from an undisclosed classmate shows the logic of children at this age. "Why can’t the Spanish teacher learn English?"

Drunk Driving Kills

George Alwyin Smith was driving westbound on Insterstate 40 to work Monday morning as he has for many years prior. He was a 55 year old father and people say he was a model citizen and neighbor. Michael Caldera De Latorre was driving the other way along Interstate 40. He veered across the median and hit George's week-old Kia. George died.

The police report that Michael smelled of alcohol. Turns out that Michael is also an illegal immigrant. He was driving a stolen vehicle from Charlotte so he must have left the Queeen city a few hours prior. He was probably drinking heavily before getting into his car. Hell, he might have been drinking while he was driving.

An entire debate can be born from the fact that De Latorre was an illegal immigrant with a driver's license. And I'll be glad to participate in such a discussion. But the fact is that he was drunk, no matter the status. And he was driving.

In about 10 years, I'll be 55. My kids will be around 15 and anxious to learn to drive, thinking I'm an uncool parent, and starting to experience so many cool things in life. I want to see that. I hope to hell that another Michael De Latorre isn't on the road as I drive to work.

Next time you're thinking about driving after having a drink, think of the other Georges on the road and don't be a Michael.

Year-Round Upheaval

For those of you not from my immediate area, we are experiencing phenomenal growth. The Triangle area of North Carolina continues to be named best place to live in the country by various magazines for various reasons. Best Place for Singles. Best Place for Families. Best Place for Business. Best Place for Yahtzee Players. You name it…we’ve been named the best. So what’s been happening? Everyone is moving here at an astonishing rate! In 1990, the town of Apex had a population of about 6,500. In 2000, that number jumped to over 20,000. Today, the number of resident is estimated at over 31,000. The once peaceful 2-lane roads have either been gridlocked with traffic, or expanded to 4 and 5 lane highways. The small town businesses have been over-shadowed by the big box retailers. And the schools are overflowing with children.

Drive by any public school in this area and you’ll see an array of “portable” units - outdoor classrooms with underpinning. It seemed this was enough to hold the kids until new schools were built. But the families kept arriving much faster than the schools could be built, and now the schools are literally busting at the seams. The local school board thought long and hard about how to handle this issue. One solution was a one billion dollar bond to pay for new schools. This passed…but the schools still could not be built fast enough. Finally, the board decided on year round schools. The kids could be divided into 4 “tracks”. At any one time during the year, 3 tracks of students would be attending class while 1 track would be on break. The sessions would last about 9 weeks with a 3-week vacation between each session. So, if 100 students lived in the area, only 75 would be in school at any one time while 25 would be on break. So. This seemed like a good idea…and in fact, the board decided to mandate this schedule for only a few schools. The problem was…some parents just didn’t like it.

I’m not sure exactly why. Perhaps the parents recalled their childhood of lazy summer days in simpler times. Or maybe there were other kids in the family attending a traditional schedule school (such as most high schools) and having multiple school schedules was just too much a pain. Or perhaps, they didn’t like the fact that Bobby might not be able to attend softball or soccer or swim team practice, or participate in band with such a schedule. Nevertheless…19 elementary schools (and 3 middle schools) were mandated to start the year-round schedule, thus orientations and arrangements had begun by schools, families, and out-of-school care programs. The year-round school year was to start on July 9…about 2 months from now.

Regardless of the plans to modify school programs and schedules, a group of complaining parents sued the school board. Many thought it was a useless and frivolous suit. After all…everything was already being changed to accommodate the year-round schedule. Well, today, Judge Howard Manning decided it was unconstitutional for the school board to mandate year-round schools. So now…who knows what the school year will hold in 2 months.

Now let me share my commentary. Year-round school is my preference. I have twins that, barring any failure of a grade, should be in the same grade throughout their educational career. There is no chance that I’ll have one kid in year-round school while another child attends a school on a more traditional schedule. I feel that any extracurricular activity wills more than likely accommodate the school’s schedule, so soccer games and swim meets will still be offered. And my kids are in year-round day care now, so there’ll be virtually no adjustment to the schedule for them and minimal adjustment of the family scheduling as well. In addition, I feel that year-round schooling is better for the kids. Again, it’s just my preference. Respectfully, I understand the argument for traditional scheduling for reasons I surmised above. Additionally, on a 9 week program, is can be argued that the first week and last weeks would be hardly efficient as most first and last weeks are not. This would result in only 7 weeks of good schooling in a 12-week period. Like I said, I understand and respect their point…it’s just not my preference.

My point for this vent isn’t the argument for or against year-round school. It’s 100% about the fact that a judge’s decision at the eleventh hour has resulted in the upheaval and uncertainty of the upcoming school year for 20,000 kids. The school board, which I believe strongly considered all options before deciding on year-round schools, must now revisit and decide on another plan, and enact it in less than 2 months. There is no way an appeal of the judge’s decision will save this school year, so schools are forced to respond quickly.

One oft-discussed option is that of split shift school attendance. This would divide the school into two shifts of 7:00AM to 12:30PM and 1:30PM to 7:00PM. Now I ask you…would you prefer year-round, or traditional with your child attending school until 7:00 at night? And if such child attended the late shift, when exactly is he or she expected to do his or her homework? Certainly, once arriving home and eating dinner at 8:00, bedtime is soon to follow. And for a good amount of families, the parents go to work early the next morning as the children are taken to some off-hour school care. One other point about this split shift is that a full lunch would NOT be provided. Therefore…would these 19 (plus more) schools have to fire their cafeteria staff?

The School Board is having an emergency meeting tomorrow. I wish them the best of luck. And I truly hope that whatever decision they’ve been basically forced to make will be honored and not met with a lawsuit. For goodness sakes…let’s just get the kids into school and not teach them how to misuse the civil law system to get what they want at the expense of 20,00 other kids.

Could You be Listed in a Database of the Mentally Ill?

As most of you know, some idiot shot the place up at Virginia Tech last month. The guy sent a video to NBC and we’ve all seen bits and pieces if his rant. I think we can all say that the guy was a mental case.

The Governor of Virginia issued an executive order requiring that a database of people banned from buying guns include the name of anyone who is found to be dangerous and ordered to get involuntary mental health treatment. Apparently the idiot (the shooter…not the governor) never checked “Yes” next to “Are you a Psycho Maniac?” on his gun application. When a background check was done, his name never came up because he was merely an outpatient mental patient…not an admitted inpatient one...so he wasn't on the existing database. This new executive order will now start including such mentally ill folks, and hopefully, background checks will catch such psychos in the future.

I’m 100% behind such an order…but then again, I’m in favor of gun control. No, I’m not going to turn this into a “right to arms” debate (gun control and one’s right to own a gun can peacefully co-exist, but that’s another blog). But there is one concern I do have over such an order. Right, now, the order talks about those who are found to be dangerous and ordered to get treatment. But what if such a database was expanded for EVERYONE that was treated for mental illness. Are you all for it? Think about it again.

One has to ask…what IS mental illness? Is it being a “rich kid and women” hater like the VT shooter? Is it someone who’s severely depressed or withdrawn? Is it someone who is prone to panic attacks? What about someone with unsettled nerves? See where I’m going? Who that’s reading this has NOT been treated for some type of depression or anxiety? Somehow, I think all your hands are still firmly on your mouse…mine included. Does that make us all mentally ill?

The Virginia Governor is 100% correct in his executive order. But when the next headline shooter is found to be taking Paxil for depression or Xanax for an anxiety disorder…be careful. The next database expansion could include your name. Maybe no big deal if you never intend to buy a gun…but you may one day apply for a job. Just something to think about.

Kaitlyn and Katlin

I live in a small town near Raleigh, North Carolina. I have a daughter who’s 4 years old. Her name is Kaitlyn. Like all kids her age, she can be the poster girl for angelic cuteness one second and a devilish troll to test one’s patience the next. I have hugged her and told her I love her far more times than I’ve had to punish her. As for punishment, it usually consists of scolding her. A Daddy’s disappointed gaze is a lethal weapon at times. I have also spanked her. No a belt-welding, butt-blistering spank, but a hard enough smack on the behind to get her attention and sting a little. In every case of punishment, I’ve followed with a hug and an apology. These don’t happen often because she’s a good girl, but she is a 4 year-old kid.

John Patrick Violette lives in a different small town near Raleigh, North Carolina. He had a daughter who’s 4 years old. Her name was Katlin. It’s been reported that she could be the poster girl of angelic cuteness. But knowing 4 year olds, I’m sure she could certainly test a parent’s patience at times. It’s been stated that John used to hug his daughter often. As such things go, no one knows if he ever punished Katlin. Well, no one knew until last Friday.

Yesterday I took the afternoon off since my son had been sick. I had lunch with the family, including Kaitie and her mom. Mommy left and I stayed home with the kids…kind of a daddy-kid day. We had fun playing, but Kaitie was also in a bit of a mood. I had to give her the daddy-gaze once or twice, but otherwise, the day went well. Mommy came home in the evening to find the kids peacefully asleep and the dishes and cutlery put away. I was on the couch watching television.

John quit his job last Thursday. On Friday, he had lunch with Katlin and his wife, Amber. Amber left for work and John stayed home with his daughter…kind of a daddy-daughter day. We have no idea what went on in the afternoon…whether little Katlin’s mood was angelic or devilish. Mommy came home in the evening to find her daughter decapitated in the hallway of their home. A knife apparently was later found to be blood stained. John had hopped a plane to Washington, DC where he was found the next day.

This morning, I awoke to see snow falling onto the ground. My kids were sleeping in since it was Mommy’s day off, but I made sure to awaken them before I left for work. Being in this part of North Carolina, it rarely snows. This was one of the few times my kids had even remembered seeing snow, so they were quite excited.

In another small town near Raleigh, North Carolina, it’s also snowing. I’m not sure John can see the snow. He’s in a jail cell now, awaiting his fate. His wife probably sees this snow, but can no longer awaken her daughter. Instead, Amber will be trudging through the snow to attend her daughter’s funeral. A Carolina snow that Katlin will never see.

As I left for work this morning, my daughter Kaitie sleepily said, “be careful Daddy, I love you.” I replied, “I love you, too. Now go back to sleep and sleep well.”

Rest in Peace Katlin. Burn in Hell John.